2 days to go!

Before you read my latest rant I want to say I have reached the point where I am less worried about things like what kind of mother I'll be, how much life is going to change, etc, and purely excited about having this baby! I'm so excited to see her little face (though it feels less like a little face and more like a giant head considering she is breech and this head is right under my diaphragm!) and get to know her! Though we're getting antsy, we're taking things day by day now and trying to give her time to do what she needs to do in there and hope she'll want to join us soon.

On that note, due to laziness, I copied an email I wrote to a friend about our latest obstetrician saga rather than write up a whole new blog. Here it is below:

Still breech. Still only dilated a fingertip (for 2 weeks now, though slightly more effaced every week but nothing to write home about yet). Still fighting with doctor. Yesterday we went through the same old shit except this time she stepped up her fear tactics and threw in a little guilt for good measure. She said, "Let me ask you this. What happens if the cord prolapses or there are other cord issues and the baby ends up with brain damage or stillborn? Wouldn't you feel guilty??" Gee, thanks Lady! I'm not 40 weeks pregnant or anything and that wouldn't happen to be a sensationally rude thing to say to a pregnant woman, would it? Paul and I have done mucho research and found out that unless you have a footling breech, you don't have any more chances of the cord prolapsing than someone who is having a vaginal birth. (And this can only occurr if your water breaks). On the subject of her turning let me point out another inconsistency the doctor said. I told her I have found out about a load of cases where the babies have turned well past 39 weeks, some even after labor set in (which she dismissed as "impossible"). So she says it's impossible because the baby has no room to move, yet yesterday when I said it looks like things are still good because the baby is still in a non-dangerous breech presentation (no feet are down near the cervix), she said "but the baby could change position when in labor and the feet could end up there." But wait! Since 37 weeks she has been telling us that the baby is never going to turn and it is impossible for the baby to change position while in labor. Oh! I guess that's only when it's convenient for her to use that information. She keeps telling us she prefers planning things and prefers to do c-sections under controlled circumstances which is why she wants us to schedule. Though as "urgently" (I use quotes because both the baby and I are perfectly healthy at the moment so there are no issues to warrent the surgery at this time) as she wants to schedule a c-section, she doesn't do them on Fridays or weekends. So it's really just all about convenience for her. I like to plan things too, but perhaps planning a birth shouldn't be taken as lightly as planning a party or vacation? Two more things I should mention that didn't sit right with me. First, when she asked what the point was in waiting to do a cesarean I said, "Well, for one, I don't think she is ready to come out yet, and also I would like to see if I can go into labor first. 'The Mayo Clinic Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy' says that there is a hormone exchange that goes on between the mother and baby when you go into labor that prepares the baby to regulate its own blood sugar once detached from the palcenta, as well as help it breathe, and also reduce the stress of coming into the world." (Think about it... if you're in this nice, warm place for 9-10 months and then all of a sudden you're ripped out and in this completely different environment without any sort of preparation or forewarning, wouldn't you freak out?) When I brought this up she got annoyed and made a comment, something about how she wishes they wouldn't have written that. Why? So people can't get the information and use it to protect themselves and will just go along with any old junk they are being told? Then the other thing that didn't sit right with me is how she pointed out that she was documenting how we kept declining the "opportunity" for an "elective" c-section. Yeah, more quotes. Go ahead! Document it! But telling us that seemed like another fear tactic; almost a threat. I'm not loving or appreciating having to fight so hard for my baby to be able to stay in the womb when there is no medical reason she shouldn't be able to. It's just too tiring right now. I know people think I am being stubborn (including the doctor who told me so yesterday), but Paul and I didn't take deciding to get pregnant lightly, so why would we take the way our baby is to be born lightly?

Why second opinions are good to have

Note: The following section was written on 7/18. I was too lazy to finish it that day but saved it as a draft and will follow up with more recent events after.


On Wednesday ( 7/16) Paul and I went to our OB for my weekly check-up and to discuss with her what happened at the hospital on Monday night (7/14). She didn't give us much hope that we'd be able to wait out getting a c-section, and I left still feeling disappointed in the whole process, especially since she wanted us to schedule the cesarian for next Thursday (7/24), the day before she was going on vacation. She said it was because she was afraid the cord would prolapse if I went into labor and then she wouldn't be there to do the surgery. However, it felt to me like we were at the mercy of what was convenient to her. When we got home I decided to find a midwife to get a second opinion from. I figured it was better to get a second opinion from a midwife rather than another OB because the midwife had no agenda other than giving us all sides of the issue. OB's seem to be c-section crazy these days (we can blame this on a lawsuit crazy country as well as convenience for the OB's) so all you seem to get from them are reasons why it's better to schedule the procedure asap rather than wait it out. They love to throw out fear-based information to scare you into the procedure. So we went and talked with the midwife this morning (7/18) and she explained to us that since the baby has no history of problems, I have no health problems, the baby is in a breech presentation that is not dangerous, and the placenta is in a good spot, there is no real risk to wait until going into labor before getting a c-section. This is important to me because I feel that the baby should stay in and "cook" there as long as she feels necessary (ok, within reason), and this will also give her more time to possibly turn head down, something which our OB is constantly telling us is impossible at this stage. No exceptions. Paul and I have done our research. We know that the chances of babies turning head down after 37 weeks are even slim. The odds are against us, but the odds were against us having a breech baby too (only about 3%), so I like to think maybe it's possible. I have heard lots of stories of babies turning after the mother is in labor. Perhaps if OB's weren't so quick to schedule cesarians they might find that more babies would turn? Maybe only 99.5% or 99% of babies would be breech? How will we ever know if nobody is allowed to go past 39 weeks with a breech, let alone allowed to go into labor?

7/25 Update:

We last went to our OB on the 21st and had a talk with her. The midwife we saw last week gave us a list of questions to ask her and it went pretty well. She still wanted to schedule a cesarian early but we told her we wanted to take it week to week. Apparently it can be dangerous if the baby's feet end up down instead of up (footling breech presentation) because she could stomp the cord out if the cervix is dialted. This is the one instance where the midwife suggested it might be better to go ahead and have a cesarian before going into labor first. As of our last check-up, the baby's feet were still up. She seems to be going between frank breech presentation (both feet up by the head) and complete breech presentation (feet crossed in the middle) so we're just having our OB check it out from week to week. At the moment I am wondering if this baby is ever going to come out. It seems I spent the whole pregnancy up to this point thinking she was going to come early and now that I'm a week away from the due date it seems like she will want to stay in there forever. So for those who have been asking, not much seems to be going on other than me getting larger. The Mave is still breech and I still spend most of my day emptying my bladder. Will keep y'all posted.

Stick Your Scalpel Where the Sun Don't Shine!

If you've read the last post you know we were scheduled to go to the hospital Monday night for an ECV. I was asked not to eat or drink anything for 8 hours prior so we were to be there at 5:30 so I could get prepped and properly hydrated via IV fluids for a 6:00pm appointment. Things were a bit backed up and we had to fill out a bunch of forms so I don't believe we got into the room until at least 6:30ish. Man was I thirsty! The nurse asked me to put on a hospital gown. Now, we're not rocket scientists or anything but it really shouldn't have taken us a whole 10 minutes to figure out how to put the damn thing on. I was definitely a team effort. It's a weird shape and none of the buttons are together and, trust me, those gowns will make you feel like a real dummy when the nurse doesn't even warn you about assembling them. So it's 6:40 now. I get into the bed and the nurse ("nurse #1") doesn't start me on an IV. She has me laying on my back and starts monitoring the baby's heart rate, as well as any contractions I may be having. I keep thinking any minute now I am going to get some damn hydration. She goes through this LONG list of questions about my medical history and then when she gets to the end asks me if I've been having contractions lately and I say no. She said,"No? Because you've just had about 5." I didn't feel any of them. She says she is going to hook me up to an IV and I will also have to get a shot to stop the contractions if I want the ECV. She leaves the room, to get the IV I am hoping, and doesn't come back for a while. It's now 6:50. Still no IV, still no perinatologist to come and turn the baby. What the hell is going on? Nurse #1 comes back in the room and says that it is the end of her shift (gee we couldn't tell) so another nurse will be coming, but she spoke with my OB and she is not happy because, during one of the contractions the baby's heart rate dropped a bit. She says because of that the OB wanted to do a C-section. Are you kidding me lady? I don't have a medical degree but I know from the pregnancy books I have read that if you are having contractions one of the things you do is drink lots of water incase you are dehydrated, and you get off your back and lay on your left side. If nurse #1 would have hydrated me before monitoring, I'm pretty sure this blog would be different. Enter Nurse #2. Nurse #2 was the best part of the whole useless experience. She cared and knew exactly what she was doing. The first thing she did was administer the IV and tell me to turn on my left side. She said she called the perinatologist and he wasn't happy about the short dip in the baby's heart rate and probably wouldn't try and turn her. At this point I am pretty upset. Nurse #1 got me so paranoid about heart rates, contractions, and c-sections that I started to shut down. So I am on the IV and we wait around for the perinatologist. It's about 8:10 and there is still no sign of him. We really liked this guy and were very upset that he just didn't bother showing up. His office is right across the street and he didn't even bother making the 5 minute walk to check in. Yeah thanks for that. So wonderful nurse#2 comes in and says she is going to try to get us out of there. She said we have a very healthy baby and there is no reason why we shouldn't be able to leave. My contractions had stopped once I got hydrated and placed on my side. She calls the OB. All of a sudden the phone in the room rings and it's the nurse saying when she hangs up our OB will be on the line. I see nurse #2 come in and mouth to me (with an appauled look on her face), "She wants to section you tonight." I mouth back, "THAT'S RIDICULOUS. NO WAY!" Summary of the conversation Paul had with the OB:

OB: I want to do a cesarian.
Paul: Why? The baby is healthy and Gina isn't having contractions. She was only having contractions because she hasn't eaten or drank since 10am and she was on her back for an hour. Can't the baby still turn on her own?
OB: No she won't turn on her own.
Paul: Why won't she turn on her own?
OB: Well, the baby is really big.
Paul: No, she is really small.
OB: No, she's 7 pounds.
Paul: No, she's tiny. She's only 5 pounds.
OB: Well she has to come out sometime.

Ok, WHAT? Really? She has to come out? No shit, Einstein! But no way were we going to let a healthy baby who has 3 weeks left to cook get cut out of me before she is ready. You're going to have to give us a damn good reason other than "Well she has to come out sometime" before you come near me with that damn scalpel, lady. So disheartening. I thought we had an amazing OB but right now it looks like she is just another part of the baby business, ready and willing to make me another statistic of our awful c-section rate here in the US. At around 8:30-8:45 I eventually got discharged. So I spent the whole day, 9 months pregnant and not able to eat or drink even water, only to get an IV shoved in my arm, my ass hang out of some weird assemble yourself sheet, and some random woman's fingers up my hoo-hah, just to walk out of there disheartened by doctors, with god knows how much less money in our pockets, and a baby that is still breech. What we did leave with is a sense of control over our sitation and, believe you me, a couple doctors are sure going to get an earful today.

37 Weeks- Long Post Alert!

Almost there! I am in awe at how fast pregnancy has gone. Where did the time go?

So on the 9th I went to the OB and she confirmed my suspicion that, although the baby had turned head down at 24 weeks, she was back to her old ways and in breech position. I think this happened around 33 weeks because I noticed I was feeling hiccups much higher in my abdomen. At the appointment the OB did a very short ultrasound and, sure enough, there was that big ol' head right side up (or, shall I say, wrong side up). I am not sure how she came up with the weight estimate, but she thought the baby was somewhere around 6.5 - 7 pounds, which is fairly large for 37 weeks. She seemed very urgent in getting us back to the fetal specialist who did all the major ultrasounds throughout the pregnancy, as he can perform a procedure called "External Cephalic Version" (ECV) which is a fancy way of saying turning the baby from the outside. We went on Friday morning and the first thing they did was an ultrasound to make sure there was no medical reason the baby had turned breech (eg: umbilical cord was restricting movement, not enough amniotic fluid, etc). Turns out the baby just turned because she is actually quite petite and, well, she could. She loves to move and decided she wanted to stare the world in the face right side up. So my OB was quite wrong in her estimation of size. The baby is just over 5 pounds right now. How anything from Paul and I could be referred to as "petite" is beyond me! How did that happen? Back to the visit on Friday. After the ultrasound the doctor decided to try a practice run to see if the Mave might respond to the ECV. He put one hand at the bottom of my abdomen and lifted her up, out of the pelvis while using his other hand to try and manipulate her from the top. He explained that what usually happens is the baby kicks its feet and then uses that motion to turn itself around. Mave did kick her feet, so he thinks there is a possibility she might turn, but he wasn't laying it on as heavy as he does during the full procedure. If you can imagine someone digging their fingers into you as hard as they can and moving them around without releasing pressure, then you can understand why I have black and blue marks on my abdomen. Since the baby has started to descend into the pelvis already, on Monday evening we go into the hospital (they do it there incase the baby goes into distress and they have to do an emergency cesarian, but that only happens about 1% of the time) and he will try the same thing, only with more force, three times, for a minute each time. They offer epidurals for this, but I declined. A needle in my back for 3 minutes of bad pain? No thanks. If the procedure works, we will hope the baby doesn't turn again. It works about 70% of the time. There was some mention from my OB about inducing labor early if she turns so she doesn't go breech again, but we will decline and go with the flow. If the doctor can't turn her then we'll wait until 39 weeks to see if she turns on her own. If that doesn't happen they like to schedule cesarians for breech babies at that time. Supposedly it's safer than going into labor and then having an emergency one. We need to read up on this one some more. I'm not sure if scheduling a c-section a week before the due date is actually going to make much of a difference, and it sort of takes away the opportunity for her to turn on her own until she is ready. You never know when you'll go into labor. We'll do some investigating before agreeing to schedule one at 39 weeks. We'll keep you posted! Keep those fingers and toes crossed!